Sunday, December 21, 2008

heylp! mah pets r all tha way in israel!!!!

y'all, i can't believe this. it's so close to christmus, and i think mah pets dun tried to escape all tha way to ISRAEL! mah molar bear, in particular has been seen sevurul times, once hangin' out with a cow and in some plants!


i've been told that thare's more to come, to stay tewned.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Hand Turkey Hank!!!

Lend a hand y'all.

In tha spirut of thanksgivin' (which y'all KNOW is a comin' shortly after devilween), heeylp!!!

Mah dear friend, Hand Turkey Hank dun gone missin' again!

The furst time he went missin' I couldn't bare to look at mah own hands fer a week (needless to say, they were NOT washed fer them 7 days neither).

Y'all pleaze heylp me find Hand Turkey Hank, but as temptin' as it may be fer that handsome reward, do NOT go a cuttin' yer own hands off and try to pretend you found him...

I ain't know scientist, but I DO know what is and what is NOT a Hand Turkey.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Larry, the Nine Mustached, Overly Concerned Walrus.

I don't know how i dun it, but...


Heeeeylp Y'all!!!

I dun lost onummy most important assets in mah pet collection. As u cane see by the diegraham, he is tha keeper of ALL mah mustaches...ALL OF 'EM!!!

pullease holleratyaboy if you see him or any of them mustaches wanderin' on the street.

*please note that mustache #4 actually an anteek i got from some war museum in germuny.


Sunday, September 28, 2008

Edward Von Snugglepuss Effort in Austin

HEYLP! Calling all filthy hippies of Austin! i dun wandered on to campus this weekend and seen a few a them kiosks to put mah flyers on. hopefully none of them filthy hippies will tryn' grab hold of Edward Von Snugglepuss and tryn' halewcinate by lickin' his back...he AINT NO AMAZONIAN RAIN FOREST FROG YOU CAN JUST LICK AND EXPECT TO GET HIGH. you'll get high alright...high as a fox. high as a dead fox. remember, Edward VON Snugglepuss is VERY RARE and VERY DEADLY!!! if you see him, call animal control immediately!!!

Pee S. Why do they call it a CAMPus if US can't camp there!??!?!?!?!?!?!

and remember. please.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008


A gentleman named James claims to have seen mah tortoises. James, puuleaaase heylp us!!!

Sunday, June 29, 2008

DANGER!!! dun lost mah feline monkey eagle...

heyylp!!! this one's reel dangereux. he's from the amazon and he once bit me on the eyeball...not the face, but directly on the eyeball!!! if you find him, you might needta call animal control cuz he's fiercer than mah fashion sense.

Monday, June 9, 2008


heyyylp!!! somebody named "Junior" dun spotted Klaus at a 7-11 in Florida!!!!